Batman v. Superman: The Most Dangerous Game

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Batman v. Superman: The Most Dangerous Game

Post by Mir »

Batman v. Superman: The Most Dangerous Game

Suburbs of Metropolis

With a groan, the man slowly rose from his bed, wondering what he had done to deserve such a raucous morning. His wife was calling his name. He poked his head out of the bedroom.

“What.” He said, his eyes still partially closed.

“Calvin.” His much shorter wife said, as she held her hands up. “The hot water heater broke.” She said.

“Son of a bitch.”

What a great way to start the day.

He walked past the bedrooms of his still sleeping children and towards the kitchen. “Did you turn the faucet over to the hot side?” He asked with a smirk as he rubbed one of his hands through his hair. When his wife glared at him he grinned. “Just checking, D.” He added as she lightly hit him on the arm. “That’s abuse, I’m going to call my lawyer friend.”

“Yeah, well, he’s on my list too. He asked me what he was supposed to do with those Omaha steaks and nice cut pork chops we sent him for Christmas. Something about not eating beef or pork. Will you fix the hot water heater?”

“Alright, alright.” Calvin MacBishop replied heading into the garage to take a look at the heater, grabbing his old radio set as he did. Might as well listen to the sports report for this Sunday. Hopefully he’d be able to get this done in time to make it. Traffic was going to be insane.


Downtown Gotham City

The tired and battered man’s eyes opened as he woke up. His body was sore and in pain. Shirtless, he swung his legs out from underneath the covers and made his way to the large mirror in the master bedroom of his apartment. Fresh bruises and contusions were visible across his chest and when he turned, across his back. Seeing them only reinforced the pain he was in. The nightshirt he hadn’t bothered to put on when he’d gotten into bed in the morning only a few hours ago was on the counter by the mirror and he reached for it, wanting to dress quickly before-

“Oh my God, who did you get into a fight with?”

He paused, one of his arms already through the sleeve of the nightshirt. Turning, he saw the woman who had been in the bed with him had risen and was sitting up in bed, staring at him with wide eyes. She wore a satin negligee and didn’t look anywhere near the condition that he did. The blonde woman had her arms folded over her chest and he could tell she wanted an answer.

You didn’t have to be a detective to figure that one out.

“Big guy.” He said, putting on the shirt but leaving it unbuttoned. “Nothing I couldn’t handle.” He said as he dropped back on the bed. Closing his eyes, he sighed. “Really, I’m fine, Britney.” He added, knowing it wouldn’t actually convince her.

“Isaiah, how big of a big guy are we talking here?” She asked. “The bruises on your back look like you got into a tussle with a crocodile.”

“Might have been a crocodile. Could have been a guy. Might have been a crocodile guy. Not sure yet. Fun times though. You should have seen the spinning back kick that ended up taking him down. Really, a thing of beauty.”

She rolled her eyes, sliding back down under the covers next to him. “Something tells me I would not have been as impressed as you think I would have been or should be.” Britney Harmon slid an arm across the chest of John Isaiah Muir, who’d only gotten about two or three hours of sleep after having returned to the penthouse apartment of the building he owned due to his proclivity to running around rooftops dressed as the symbol of Gotham’s Justice and Vengeance, the Batman.

Suddenly, Britney’s eyes, which had started to close, snapped open. “Did you agree to having that dinner party yesterday in order to get close to a target or a mark?” She asked.

No answer.

“Isaiah, tell me the truth.”

No answer.

“I will tell Superman that you let Shadow tear apart that Superman Fan Club stuffed doll of Krypto he gave you for-“

“Maybe.” Isaiah replied and she, middle knuckles first, gouged one of his contusions on his chest, forcing him to wince and hold his breath.

“You’re an asshole.”

“That’d be the alien’s reaction if you tell him what I did, so now you just lost your leverage.” He turned her so that her back was to his chest. “Bad move, Harmon.”

“But he manages to pull off that look that makes you think you made a puppy cry.”

“I did. Shadow cried tears of joy.”

As his name had been spoken twice now, the dog in question walked into the room. Though he was a Kryptonian canine and Asgardian wolfhound mix, he’d taken more after his master than his genetic heritage. His weight was tremendous, and his claws sharp, but there was nary a sound as he padded in on the hardwood floors. He was silent and stealthy. But he did announce his presence with a whine, before jumping up on the bed and settling down at the foot of it.

“You know, we’ve got a lot to do today.” She said. “It’d be nice if Batman didn’t have to stick that cowl into places he’s not needed.”

“Promise.” Isaiah said, burying his face into Britney’s hair. “I need to sleep.” He said.

“Fine.” Britney replied, pulling his arms tighter around her and settling in, grabbing her cell phone from the nightstand. She still had work to get done.


-You know, it’s a big day, a big day indeed. Not every day that something of this magnitude happens. It’s incredible.

Oh, I agree. The pressure is on to deliver, without a shadow of a doubt.

Calvin adjusted the radio from where he’d placed it as he grabbed one of his wrenches with his other hand. He was listening to the sports radio for Metropolis. It was an important day, after all, and it didn’t look like he was going to make it. This hot water heater was going to be the death of him. He was always having to tinker with it. Something was always off. But that’s what happened when you were probably the only guy in Metropolis who bought from Stark instead of Chase or Wayne. The salesman had stiffed him and Calvin was looking forward to the day when he could get to the store and give that salesman a piece of his mind.

He absentmindedly touched the two tickets that were in his shirt pocket before redoubling his efforts. The lawyer friend he had been talking to his wife about had given him the tickets to hold onto for today. As if on cue, his cell phone started to ring. He fished the phone out of his pocket and put it on speakerphone.

“Are you getting ready?” His friend asked.

"Yeah. Hot water heater broke though, so I've got to fix it."

"Oh good Lord."

"Yeah. I'll call you as soon as I've finished it." He said and hung up.

Time passed as he started working on the heater. So focused, so zoned in, Calvin almost missed the ground shaking some distance away and the sound of an explosion.

Normally, he wouldn’t have paid it any mind, that was business as usual in Metropolis, but he figured it’d make sense to check on it. After all, he was on a time crunch and the last thing he wanted was more complications.


“You should give up. This isn’t going to end well for you.” Superman said.

“Anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?” The heavily armored man replied. He tossed Superman off of him and rose, servos in his armor whirring as they assisted him in raising himself. “Because you talk way too much.”

“I’ve simply been repeatedly asking you to give up.”

The armored man shook his head. “If I haven’t given you an answer by now, it’s probably a no, don’t you think?” He asked.

Superman paused and considered. “Sure, but I should still give you the opportunity. I don’t know when you might come to your senses and change your mind.”

“Not going to happen.”

Superman easily caught the punch thrown his way. “Are you sure? We can have this whole situation cleared up by-“

He was thrown backwards, as the man in the armor activated a feature in the suit that accelerated the fist, surprising Superman and forcing him backwards. The fist detonated, having turned into a missile. It also revealed that the armored man was a rock creature of sorts.

Superman rose from the ground, brushing dirt off his suit. “That…that wasn’t wise.”

Heat vision leapt out from his eyes and he burned a line through the armor before using his superior speed to land in front of the armored man, shoving his hands into the gash caused by the vision. With very little effort, Superman ripped the armor off of the man, kicking him backwards.

The rock creature man shook his head, revealing a red gem of sorts on the back of his head. He looked ready to charge forward when out of nowhere, a wrench came flying and hit him in the back of the head, square on the gem. Immediately, his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he dropped to the ground.

Superman looked, shocked, and turned slightly to see a man in shorts and a short sleeve dress shirt standing there, looking at him.

“Thank you, good citizen of Metropolis.” Superman said.

“This is a residential neighborhood.” Calvin said. “Keep it down.” He added.

“Of course, of course.” Superman said, looking down at the unconscious form of his foe. As he looked back up, he saw the two tickets in the man’s front pocket. “I see you’ve got tickets for today.” He said. “Are you excited?” He asked.

“Probably won’t even make it. Hot water heater broke.” Calvin replied, walking over and picking up his wrench. “Wanted to make sure you didn’t destroy the rest of my house with your carrying on.” He said.

The Man of Steel nodded. His foe looked like he was going to be unconscious for some time and now he knew how to stop the man, just hit the gem. “Maybe I could help?” He asked.

“You know anything about hot water heaters?”

“Well, no, but I am quite handy.” Superman said with a smile.

Calvin nodded. “Can’t hurt, I guess. My wife might try to hug you.”

“I’m used to things like that.”

“Not her hugs.” Calvin said, turning around and starting to walk towards his house.


The morning had passed with little fanfare. Isaiah was in the car with Britney, and they were pulling into the driveway of Wayne Manor. His brow furrowed when he saw Winston standing outside, as if he had been waiting for them for some time. There was a box on the ground by the front door, by Winston’s feet. Isaiah got out of the car, and walked up to his oldest friend, noting the look of consternation on Winston’s face.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“This arrived for you this morning. I wasn’t sure who would have done something like this, and I figured it better if I let you see it exactly as it arrived.” He said, and Isaiah looked down at the cardboard box. Shadow came over and sniffed it, recognizing a scent. He turned and whined at his master.

Isaiah crouched and peered into the box, studying the contents.

This wasn’t good. It was quite the opposite. It meant war.

“Winston, make sure my suit is ready. I need to change.”

“Which suit?” Winston asked.

“You know which one. This is war. This is personal.”


“Oh. My. GAWD.”

Superman wasn’t sure if his ribs were breaking or bending out of place, but Calvin’s wife was doing a very good job of testing his Kryptonian durability as she hugged him.

“D, leave the man alone.” Calvin said. “He’s going to try to fix this God forsaken water heater.” He said, as his wife finally disentangled herself from Superman.

“Calvin, he probably has more important things to do.”

“I enjoy helping every citizen of Metropolis, no matter what their issues are.” Superman replied, as he followed Calvin into the garage.

He crouched in front of the water heater and looked at it, using his X-ray vision. “Oh, I see the problem.” He said. “This shouldn’t take that long at all.”


He walked through the hallways with purpose, the black of his attire suiting him. People got out of his way, because, well, that’s just who he was. The look on his face was one that indicated he didn’t want to be trifled with. After all, this was very important. Isaiah opened the door to the giant room, and stepped inside. As he did, the people in the room let their conversations wither and die. Isaiah strode forward, his eyes only on the man who was seated in the prime real estate of the room.

“I’ve been waiting for you.” The seated man said.

“Oh, I’m sure you have.” Isaiah said, dropping the cardboard box into the chair next to the man.

“I see you got my message.”

Isaiah, wearing one of his pristine suits, sat down next to the man who considered him a friend.

“You realize, of course, that this means war.” He said.

“Isaiah, I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Christopher Chase replied, with a smile as he looked into the box, the conversations in the room restarting, but in more hushed tones.

Inside was a piece of paper with a few drawings on it. They were mock ups, concept designs of a ring.

A championship ring.

Exodus Bowl IV was emblazoned on the sides of the ring. The Metropolis Monarchs logo was on the face of the ring, covered in diamonds.

“Dangerous game you’re playing, cripple.” Isaiah said, kicking the hoverchair.

“Sit down, and enjoy the game.” Christopher said, indicating the stadium that was outside of the owner’s box. “It’s going to be a good one.”

Ladies and Gentlemen, Exodus Bowl IV will be starting soon. It's going to be a crazy game, befitting of it's moniker: WORLD'S FINEST."

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Re: Batman v. Superman: The Most Dangerous Game

Post by Nichalus »

Christopher leaned over to Isaiah with a quirky grin. "Interesting 'trade' you made before the game." He turns and faces forward again, looking down on the field of play, then looking at the lopsided score. "Not that it appears to be helping."

"I'm watching you Handicap Man." Isaiah grumbles. "If your eyes so much as catch the Sunlight wrong and glow even the slightest, I'm going to send Animal Control to your place and have Krypto neutered."

Christopher chuckles slightly. "That I would like to see. But there is alot of game left to play. You could make a comeback."
:obiwan: The 'Old Man' of the Exodus

EFFL Champion (2013-2016) First Two-Time Exodus Champion

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